Allan Appel Photo
Will Jackson aces the knot.
Without knowing quite why, six girls and ten boys in separate groups meeting on different nights passed around a roll of toilet tissue.
Each kid was asked to tear off off the number of sheets used in a regular bathroom visit.
If you tore off, say, six, you had to tell six facts about yourself — like school attended or favorite color or an interest or fear.
That ice-breaker launched teens in west-side public-housing developments on a three-month journey of self-sufficiency, which they celebrated in high style Tuesday evening.
The ten sessions of discussions on self-esteem, bullying, and how to present yourself to the world were called “Teen Talks.” It involved young people living in the rebuilt Brookside and Rockview public-housing developments at the base of West Rock. Takima Robinson ran the program with volunteers Jamila Bello and Braxton Lyons.
Teen Talkers Amani Knotts, Markeia Lewis, Armani Vasquez, and Diamond Faison.
Robinson decided the culminating gathering of the first three months’ work should celebrate beauty and grooming, in keeping with the self-esteem theme.
So on Tuesday night, at Brookside’s community room, the boys and girls, who all live in the Brookside and Rockview communities though they go to different schools, socialized and practiced what they had learned.
Quickly the girls were helping each other with acrylic glue-on nails and other make-up while boys like Will Jackson got haircuts and practiced knotting those holiday ties.
Lyons, Bello, and Robinson, with Hillhouse and ECA teen Amani Knotts in the red checks.
These gatherings to talk to kids about social skills and self-presentation might not seem like a big deal to those who take such activities for granted.
For Robinson, the work is a crucial, and a calling.
Robinson came to live in Brookside in 2012 with her three then teens. She graduated from the Housing Authroity of New Haven’s (HANH) self-sufficiency program. She went onto become a homeowner in Westville and returns to her old digs as a social coordinator.
Robinson said that most of the kids in the 278 families she works with at Brookside and Rockview live in single parent, female-led households.
That means many of the boys miss one rite of passage to adulthood: when dad stands behind his son and shows him the intracacies of the Windsor knot often doesn’t happen.
Will Jackson, a 12-year-old at Elm City Middle School, knew how to tie his practice tie with alacrity. His mom had taught him.
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Robert Adams of Headquarters Barbershop gives Will Jackson a holiday edge at Tuesday night’s party.
Will said the conversations in Teen Talks helped him to motivate himself and stay focused, especially under pressure.
For him, that pressure expressed itself most seriously in people trash-talking at him on the court when he plays for his Elm City Middle School basketball team.
After he missed a first free throw at a recent game, a kid said to him, “You suck, and you can’t shoot a foul shot.” Will said he ignored the talk, didn’t let it bother him. And he sank the second free throw.
Just before Will stepped down from Robert Adams’ barber chair improvised in the community room for the party, Diamond Faison took a look and pronounced the result “fresh.”
Diamond said she learned during the ten sessions sometimes to be wary of what friends might lure you into: “Don’t let people, even your close friends, fool you. Like saying, ‘Oh come on, just come on over and smoke.’”
Armani Vasquez and Diamond Faison socialize over the dos and don’ts of acrylic nails.
Jaylon Lloyd, a 12-year-old who attends Wintergereen Interdistrict Magnet School, said he learned a simple lesson, which applied Tuesday night: say hello to people when you walk into a room.
He said hello to Brenda Ward, secretary of the Interstate Realty Management (IRM) company, which manages Brookside and Rockview under a contract with the housing authority.
“Good evening,” she said right back to Jaylon.
IRM hired Better Tomorrows, an international social services organization working with low/middle income families,which hired Tamika Robinson to provide social services at Brookside.
Robinson said she organized the groups with lessons and exercises — like that toilet tissue icebreaker — based on what she learned raising her three kids.
Ward and Jaylon Lloyd reenact their “good evening.”
Teen Talks will continue. The next unit will focus on sexuality, pregnancy prevention, dating, and hygiene. The third unit will cover drug prevention. Each unit lasts three months, with a culminating event like the celebration of beauty and grooming on Tuesday.
“Most of these kids are growing up in single mom households. I want these kids to think outside the [public-housing] box,” Rpbinson said. She’s looking for some outside help to afford to take the teens to trips around town — for instance to look behind the scenes at radio and TV stations.
To contribute or to get involved, contact Robinson .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).