That was the message Barbara Fair (pictured) and other moms gathered at the public library Thursday sent to Connecticut’s criminal justice system.
The pain in the room was palpable. So was the frustration, as women who had been in prison told stories of how their incarceration affected their children, both while they were in jail and after they got out.
The gathering at the New Haven Free Public Library’s Community Room last night was the first of two “Community Conversations” on the subject sponsored by People Against Injustice, a New Haven-area group that works on prison issues. The goal of the evening was not just to share sad stories, but to improve a situation that affects millions of children whose mothers are in jail, or on probation or parole.
The number of women incarcerated in the U.S. increased from 13,400 in 1980 to more than 100,000 in 2003, mostly due to non-violent drug-related crimes. Three-quarters of the women are mothers, and most have children under 18.
Corendis Bonner of Hartford served 19 months for a non-violent offense, conspiracy to commit bank fraud. Her son was 5 when she went to prison. “He’s 11 now,” she said, “and every morning when I put him on the bus, he asks me, —ÀúMommy, are you going to be here when I get home?’” She said her son had special needs and was eventually diagnosed as autistic, but some teachers and administrators at his school just blamed her for his problems. When she tried to have a role in decisions affecting him, one educator told her, “You’ve already done enough damage.” Bonner said, “The school made some decisions about who he was not based on his abilities but on my having been in jail.”
Another woman who served time in prison said both her children quit school while she was in prison, largely because they couldn’t stand the harassment and judgmental attitudes of students and staff, who knew she was in jail.
Many people support the idea that “if you do the crime, you do the time.” But tens of thousands of women are incarcerated for simple drug possession, and many experts say they would be better off in treatment than in prison. Many others are convicted as co-conspirators in drug busts when they have served —” often unwittingly —” as couriers. The costs to women and their children, and society at large, are enormous.
Barbara Fair of People Against Injustice said she served just 15 days in jail 30 years ago, but she had an infant at the time whom she was nursing. She said she felt the same as many other incarcerated mothers: “The very worst thing was being separated from my child.” Often, the state takes a woman’s children away, deeming her an unfit mother.
Fair said she was frustrated that more women who’d been incarcerated didn’t come to the program, despite many promising to do so. “We learned from the civil rights movement that it worked only when the people most affected came out in droves. Where are they? I feel we are begging for crumbs. Why? We have a right to demand that you stop taking our kids, that you stop locking us up, that you stop concentrating your law enforcement in our areas because this is who you want to put in prison. And until we get loud and demand that it change, it’s going to continue to happen. All we need is a voice and unity, and we could make some major changes in what’s going on in this city and this state.”
The second Community Conversation on this topic is scheduled for Jan. 5, from 6 to 7:45 p.m. in the community room at the main library.